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Monday, May 28, 2012

Letting Go

When was the last time you were truly bored? As adults most of us are way to busy to be understimulated each day, but when you are my daughters age you can find a lot of nothing to do real quick. Its not even summer and school is not even out and Emma, all of a sudden has nothing to keep her mind going. Lincoln on the other hand has plenty of things to keep him stimulated, and with this part of his treatment on steroids, its all or nothing to keep him from having a meltdown.

Tonight we went to the nearby shopping area, for the fourth time today, to get Lincoln something that would turn his bath water colorful. We knew it would not go well because he would start picking up things he liked that cost too much money, and would start tearing up if he knew we were even suggesting that he could not get it. We made it out of the store with only 3 more items than we came for and tonight we are spending the rest of the holiday watching our new kids movies.

This weekend was great for me because I actually had a chance to slow down to the point of nearly being bored. I worked on my backyard project in hopes of completeing it, but I made a few changes and finished about half of it. We went across the street to Grandmas for lunch and Lincoln wanted to take a bath in the big bath tub. While we were still eating lunch he went into the bathroom and waited patiently, which was a miracle in itself. After a while I went to see that he had fallen asleep on the bathroom floor. I still had some energy so I went to mow the grass and later went back to my house by myself. I had a little time to watch tv and lay on the couch and then it happened. For the first time since I was a teenager, I was bored.

Somedays it seems that the only content in life it to remain stimulated through whatever we can find to fight the feeling that there is nothing to do. I see those things in people all the time, in the things they do and say, in the things they put into their bodies and take out with their bodies. These things that stimulate us are not the things that always fulfill our purpose in life and they can become harmful if they remain unchecked. One of the greatest "feelings" you can ever have is when you relinquish and let go of those desires that seem all to often to consume you. Trust me, even when it seems the world is against you, giving up and giving in, not to your desires, but to the needs of another can be your saving grace.

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