When it comes to life most people have their minds set on things like time, money, work, love or fun. Me, I have these things on my mind, but there is one thing I can't get off of my mind since July 1, 2011. Today I was over 30 miles away from home when I got the phone call that my son was going to the emergency room 30 miles away in the other direction. Since my son Lincoln was diagnosed with leukemia last year I have not wanted to be far from home when I got that phone call because I didn't know what would happen to him next. I was between job sites but I got on the freeway and drove straight home hoping to catch them before they left. Fortunately when I got home the emergency was lowered to a high alert after some tylenol and a night of rest.
You see, when cancer is on your mind, it is on your mind forever. I can forget about work on the weekends, I can forget about money on payday, and I can forget about time when I am sleeping, but I can't get cancer off of my mind. It would be great to be able to watch a movie or a tv show or sports without thinking about it but even then it comes back to mind. Last night I was watching a talent show, yes I like talent when it is good and yes I was watching Dancing with the Stars...by myself. All of the dances were in memory of people that the Dancing Stars knew that had passed away. The one that stuck out the most was Donald Driver, who happens to be a football player on my favorite team, the Green Bay Packers. He was dancing for a friend who died of cancer and I have to say he showed off more than his football footwork with a very sentimental dance that even moved him emotionally.
When cancer is on my mind it is like competing for a golden trophy. (The ribbon for childhood cancer is golden too) The trouble with competing with cancer is that it has many ways of getting an edge. It does everything that would be illegal in a normal competition, from cheating to taking cheap shots those fighting against it. Since I know there is going to be some feirce competition I am going to need a Mind of God to focus on the prize that is my sons life.
It doesn't matter who you are, cancer comes in uninvited and steals, kills and destroys. That is why I can't get cancer off of my mind, but you know what? Why would I take my eyes off of my enemy when it can overtake me in a moment of weakness. No matter where I am or what I am doing, whether it is work or fun, I will be aware that cancer is affecting someone. By keeping focused I will keep my competitive edge and claim the victory against this proven champion.
2 comments:
I love what you write. Praying for Lincoln and all of you.
Very, very true, Brian! I often say that the childhood cancer ribbon is gold because children are MORE precious than gold. :) God bless and keep you and your family!
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